The Inclusion-Exclusion Principle

Humans are social creatures. One of our primary wants is the need to connect with other humans, be accepted and share our thoughts and feelings with each other. There are lots of animals that are not loners. Wolves for example, always move around in packs. So do elephants and primates(monkeys, chimpanzees). Even small little ant is not alone. In fact many of them have pretty complex structures.

However none is as complex as the human structure. Humans are part of many groups at any given time. Family, friends, colleagues, acquaintances etc.  Now being the complex beings that we are, we divide these into numerous categories and sub-categories. Relatives get divided into close and distant. Friends into good, bad, just know, BFF and so on.

So what is it that makes us include some and exclude some from our circles. Basic human nature is to blame. We like to be around people that make us feel comfortable. If more people in a group (any group- family/friend) feel threatened or inferior to one particular individual they tend to gang up and exclude that one individual. And this is common across any social structure. Even in primates, if the head(dominant individual) of the pack doesnt like a particular individual, he/she drives that individual out of the group and since the head is doing that, the group follows suit. However, humans are not that kind. They will play games. They dont want the unwanted and unliked individual to "feel bad". Hence they will taunt, or get together and not invite, etc.

The root of all this is insecurities within the group. Maybe because of the way they have behaved in the past or experienced things in the past. Sadly this behavior cannot be changed. Hence, we have so many groups, based on ethnicity, religion, region, language, caste. Basically, anything to classify or label each other. Acceptance of each other comes only with maturity and that is rare. Just because someone is young doesnt make them immature and just because someone is older doesnt make them mature.
Humans are complex no doubt. But science and nature have shown us that simplicity is the best. Simplify your lives and relationships. Tolerance and acceptance of each other is paramount to a happy and carefree existence that we all crave for. It is achievable. Just Simplify...

The Hurt and the Reality...

Sometimes in life, you have to accept that there are certain things that cant happen anymore.
And when those moments arrive and hit you, one does have a hard time reconciling with the reality that is life.
Like when you are small, you dont realise, that everyday is life happening and your past forming. When you "grow up" you realise that you never were that person you thought you were and are not the person you thought you would become. You never were part of that perfect family they showed on TV, you may not be living that life you had envisioned for yourself, you may have missed certain goals and deadlines that you had set for yourself, you may never graduate from that fancy college with a fancy degree, you may never be a priority in that one persons life. But, life is a little kind. She gives us these happy realisations in steps and installments, sort of like EMIs that come all through your life. But then there comes a moment when it all hits you all at once in a flash and then life never feels the same again.

But the beauty of the human spirit is such that it allows us to dream new dreams and hope new hopes. However now those hopes and dreams get tainted with the bitter doses of reality. What we have to do is try and dream with all our might and soul. For even when it hurts, you still have the chance to be the person you want to be and live the life you want to lead. The hurt is like a flu shot. It doesnt insulate you from all the flues of world, but gives you antibodies to fight the ones that you have faced, fight back and flourish!
BE HAPPY ALWAYS!

Who are you?

Who are you? - How often do you get asked this question? My guess is very rarely. The question you get asked is What do you do ? So, you introduce yourself as "my name is John Doe and I am a professional artist" for example. Did you just notice the subtlety in the above two sentences ? The answer to the question who are you is "I am a professional artist". This is mind blowing. It means that who you are is tied down to what you do as a profession. For many of us, what we do prfessionaly doesnt really define who we are.
         This boils down to a basic question- Why do we choose the professions that we do? When we are kids, we are asked the question,
"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
And we answer"  I want to be a doctor".
"Why do you want to be a doctor?"
"I want to help and heal people"
And that, is the real answer as to why should you become a doctor- to help and heal people.
Why should you become a lawyer - to help people fight for their rights and get what is theirs
Why should you become a teacher - to spread knowledge and help in empowering people
But as we grow, society corrupts our minds. Now your success is measured by how much money you make. But is that really correct. If you want to know how successful a doctor is, go chat with his patients. Are they happy and healthy? Or a teacher, ask her students how do they feel about their studies and coming to class? Do they come running and skipping to class with a smile on their faces?
If the answer to these questions is yes, then yes you are a successful doctor, you are a successful teacher.
In life we can rarely do the things we love everyday. The trick is to leave that greed of earning a fatter pay check, owning a bigger car and come down to the basics. For the above things can give you happiness, but its short lived. Its not true happiness. Its just a satisfaction of having acquired a thing which will be soon replaced with a desire to acquire more. And this chain is endless. Whereas true happiness can be found in something as simple as taking your dog for a walk, playing and spending time with your children, cooking a nice meal for your famliy, having a nice quiet conversation with your partner...The possibilities are endless.
Who are you? The answer to this question has infinite answers. YOu can be a adventurer, or an artist or a warm human being who loves meeting people or a readaholic who loves reading books...The choice is yours. So, who are you? :)

What do YOU think ?

You must be wondering why I am asking you this question. You may ask " What do you think about what .." But this is a general question. What do you think about anything. Anything under the sun. The first prerequisite to this would be do you think at all?
In this fast paced world full of social media, social connections and people all around, do you think any thoughts of your own ?

Our minds are constantly bombarded by thoughts and feelings of others: be it via social media, television programs, advertisements and people around us. It is up to us to make sense of all this information overload and make sense of the things and form our own opinions.So your thoughts can definitely be influenced, I mean that's how we evolve and grow. But your decisions should be taken only after due consideration. This is especially true when your decisions affect the lives of your loved ones. For e.g. we hear of kids misusing the internet and BBM and other messengers. So by getting influenced by and without thinking it through, you ban your kids from all sources of internet, TV etc. One may argue that prevention is better than cure. But then by that philosophy, vaccines would not exist now would they ?
By proper and monitored exposure, I am sure you can teach your kids the difference between right and wrong, good and bad. After some time they will be able to distinguish on their own as the human mind is an amazing machine. But if they don't know what is wrong, how will they recognize something when its wrong.

So before doing anything take a minute and think. The human mind is capable of storing millions of  things and using them to decide. Don't let others decide your life and thoughts for you. For then that is the difference between an animal in the zoo and one in the Jungle. The former gets food and glances but cannot decide anything and can nothing but stay behind bars and let the zoo keepers decide when they walk and sleep and eat.
Ah! But the ones in the wild. They are free to make their own mistakes and learn and adapt. They can decide for themselves whether they want to walk or sleep or even if they want to eat. That my dear readers is true freedom. Freedom to think. As a very famous poem by Rabrindranath Tagore and I quote ,
"Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high,
Where knowledge is free
 Where the world has not been broken up into fragments,
By narrow domestic walls
Where words come out from the depth of truth
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way
Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit
Where the mind is led forward by thee
Into ever-widening thought and action
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake. "

I would like to replace the word country with "MIND".
Let me know what you think!

All that glitters is Gold!

We as a country are obsessed with Gold. When I say obsessed I mean super obsessed. Any major function calls for a visit to the Goldsmith. If its a festival or any auspicious day like Gudi Padwa, Akshay Tritiya, it is not surprising to see a huge line to buy gold outside most of the prominent and well known Jewelers' shops. No matter what, people will buy gold. Whatever the price whatever the hardship(standing in the sun for hours to just get into the gold shop). And people like me just find it amusing to watch. Any auspicious day and gold prices are sure to shoot through the roof. So buying the day before the auspicious occasion and selling it the next day seems more auspicious to me (You may frown here).

What is this age old love affair with the glittering metal ? Well, it stems from the fact that we Indians are very conservative in our approach to everything. Be it our dressing, our homes and even our investments. No one believes in the stock market. Most excuses seem to hover around reasons like - It is just too unpredictable., I dont understand it, I think its very volatile, you never know when is the right time to buy. Umm, one may argue these excuses are very valid, but isnt that true about gold as well? Do we really understand gold? Isnt it unpredictable too? I mean there is sometimes a difference of 1000 rs per day in the price for 10 gms.
There was a recent article in a reputed finance newspaper about how Indians keep buying gold, whereas that money could have been invested in equity which would mean that companies would have more capital to work on and expand and grow. Gold on the other hand just sits at home, needs to be guarded and does not really do anything except put more worry into our already over stressed heads.
Don't get me wrong. I am not anti-gold. Like every fellow Indian  I too love Gold jewellary. But I dont believe in it as an investment. Its like any other Commodity I may buy. A cell phone or a laptop, It is mine. I will not sell it. The Gold chain and earrings mean something to me and have sentimental value which is the exact reason why gold just piles up at home. You will never sell it.

So buy gold but use it. Dont let it gather dust in the dark dingy lockers in the bank and in the cupboards.
Because for anything to shine there has to be light.

The Water Crisis : Credit v/s Debit

The recent water shortage has everyone up in arms. The very mention of a water cut sends jitters down the spine of most people. I am no different. I love water. I have been swimming, playing holi, watering my garden etc etc. All the activities I enjoy have one major  component. Water. What are we without water. approx 70% of the human body is made up of  water. SO when there's going to be a shortage, everyone should be worried.

Water is found in abundance in most places where civilizations flourish. Or let me put it the other way round. Civilizations and life flourishes where there is abundance of water.
So most cities have a river or two running through the heart of the city. Now earlier the river was the main life line of the settlement. All the activities would center around the river. The river was the local deity. The "Karta Dharta" of the village. Since there were no dams or storage reservoirs, how good or bad the summer was going to be could be predicted by looking at the water and the health of the river.

Fast forward to today. The rivers have been reduced to a stinking mass of sewage. It is no longer a sight to behold. The chances are that if one is crossing a bridge, most probably the noses would be wrinkled in disdain at the stench emanating out of the waters. The water is now stored in huge reservoirs outside the city where the rivers originate and thankfully they have been maintained clean and pure. Thanks in part to the various crocodiles that supposedly dwell in their waters.

But the problem of water shortage seems to occur over and over. This year the city received 1.5 times more rainfall than the previous year. And still we have a water problem even before the start of the summer. What may be the cause of this? Well, the same thing that seems to be causing the numerous recessions and debt crisis. Mismanagement of resources. Consuming more that we have. What needs to be remembered here is that money can be spent in credit. But the water reservoirs are more like debit cards. What you see is the amount you have. You cant borrow water from nature when the reservoirs dry up. You will have to wait for the monsoons to fill it up kind of like you have to wait for your paycheck. And one more key difference is, there may or may not be an increment in the rainfall this year similar to your paycheck. So spend wisely and enjoy the fruits for a longer time. A penny saved is a penny earned and a drop saved is a drop earned.